I enjoyed reading your short poem and Noel's critical point. I prefer to call it a short poem and not a haiku. The first stanza sets the background or the conflict. Rain stands for obstacles. The black umbrella stands for the perspective which is the way the poet looks at the conflict. The second stanza reaches the climax by the wonderful expression:"alter of wisdom". Prayers can restore the poet's wise way of judging problems. Do you see why this is a short poem and not a haiku?
Thanks a lot Rita... When I created this I never thought of linking both of them.. but as you said there is a subtle connection thus making it a short poem...
love 'alter of wisdom' ~ truly is there ~ lovely poetry and haiku on your blog ~ so glad to 'connect' ~ you are an 'enlightened being' ~ namaste, Carol (A Creative Harbor)
I like the nature touches of the first one, a real haiku in my opinion. The second one is also good, but the altar of wisdom is too broad a concept. As I mentioned, a good haiku should be clear and simple in meaning. A nature image, as a contrast does the work effectively like the rain in the first one ~
I love both... both are very unique and make for an amazing read...lovely work done here. :)
ReplyDeletethanks jas!
ReplyDeleteOh I simply love the second one.. It's amazing. Great work Tarun :)
ReplyDeleteThanks a lot Shikha!
Delete"mighty droplets", unique image in it!, last one was very very wise! cheers :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Jaideep!
Deletedeep! beautiful imagery - one feels the rains about to fall in huge showers!
ReplyDeleteand the other, the power of prayers and reflection to clear up confusion, undertainty and doubts. Great haikus!
ReplyDeleteThanks Noel!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your short poem and Noel's critical point.
ReplyDeleteI prefer to call it a short poem and not a haiku.
The first stanza sets the background or the conflict. Rain stands for obstacles. The black umbrella stands for the perspective which is the way the poet looks at the conflict.
The second stanza reaches the climax by the wonderful expression:"alter of wisdom". Prayers can restore the poet's wise way of judging problems.
Do you see why this is a short poem and not a haiku?
You got a new fan:))
~Rita
Thanks a lot Rita... When I created this I never thought of linking both of them.. but as you said there is a subtle connection thus making it a short poem...
Deletelove 'alter of wisdom' ~ truly is there ~ lovely poetry and haiku on your blog ~ so glad to 'connect' ~ you are an 'enlightened being' ~ namaste, Carol (A Creative Harbor)
ReplyDeleteThanks Carol
DeleteBoth haiku are too good .. its nice ..:)
ReplyDeletethanks Anu
Deletethanks loredana
ReplyDeleteThere is great beauty in the image of your palms being a temple of wisdom. Delightful!
ReplyDeleteGathering Wisdom
Sorry, and ALTAR of wisdom!
ReplyDeleteI like the nature touches of the first one, a real haiku in my opinion. The second one is also good, but the altar of wisdom is too broad a concept. As I mentioned, a good haiku should be clear and simple in meaning. A nature image, as a contrast does the work effectively like the rain in the first one ~
ReplyDeleteHave a good weekend ~
Love both of them. Very evocative and nicely crafted.
ReplyDelete